Why God

Why did you take my Frank? he had been through so much and battled hard battles and always came through, we were suppose to grow old together, we were perfect together, we said I love you everyday and never spent a night away from each other... how can I mend my heart, how can I pick up the peices and keep them all put together.. how do I empty his dresser drawer or put his things away... you took him away from me now help me do this life alone without my other half

They come in three's I heard

First Frank needs a new liver, he is wasting away fast..
Then my Aunt who is my Godmother is dying, she is in heart failure..
Then today I had a message on my voicemail when we got home from spending 12 hours at the transplant work-up.. my dad may have prostrate cancer.. and if it is he is not healthy enough to survive surgery according tot he docs.. all at once...it wasn't enough almost losing Frank a couple years ago and my great nephew having a rare cancer.. just not enough to test my faith or my heart...

Not a vent

It seems I have forgotten the power of prayer, I really felt alone here in the big city, friends that live minutes away to busy and wrapped up in their own lives, family to busy or moved away to far.. nobody ever calls anymore unless it is with a problem of their own.. of course there has been a couple people who are there and do call and I feel their care and love through the phone and emails but they live far away...
then just when I am sinking into the low lonely feelings the phone rings.. a long lost bestest friend called out of the blue just when I needed her ear.. she lives 10 hours away but just hearing her voice made it all ok again... then another friend emailed that I have lost touch with.. she is a strong believer in God and brings comfort with her.... then someone I don't even really know that well has reached out her hand to help with little simple things like shopping and that takes a big worry off my mind when I have a child in the home that likes to eat like a teenage boy even though she is a 11 yr old girl!.. yes God is there and he just let me know he always was and will always be...
I may not want to travel this road again but I know every curve and will do it and I will do it scared and with a hurt heart and the fear of losing Frank this time around and as before I will do it God by my side and I will thank him for another day with Frank and pray for another one.

just a inconvenience

This is my life and I need to accept it..
I am doing it alone and I have it accept that..
I am a inconvenience to family and friends and I have to accept that...
I am not to bother friends and family unless they want something from me and I need to accept that...
Frank is ill and may not live another year and I have to accept that...
I have to figure out everything and how to handle everything by myself and I just have to deal with it..
I am alone even though I live with my husband and child and have to accept that...
This is the cards I was dealt and although many backs have been turned on me I will not turn my back on anyone... I am who I am I am sad I am scared and I am carrying a plate that is heavy and I need a friend but accept the fact they find me and my life and needs inconvenient.
ignore the tears they are self pity, ignore the heartbreak I feel, I caused it because I chose to love, ignore me and be to busy or tired or just not feeling like giving me a ride when my fridge is empty, it's my fault some how ...
Call me when you need a favor, I will be right here and will help you.

economy sucks

What a wonderful day to wake too...
First the coffee pot decided not to work anymore.. I NEED COFFEE.. aint happening..
Then the phone rings, I have been manning the phone during the night hours at home for a friend of a friend who has a garage, they do get calls in the middle of the night for a needed towing or jump or lock out.. I get all the info call who ever is on call that night and get their butts up..well do to the loss of money and tightning of belts I am kicked to the curb.. I really needed that 800 a month and it worked out great since I am taking care of my hubby and raising a troubled child... now what? oh well... we will be ok, somehow things will work out how they are suppose to... but what a blow.. no warning, just poof...

This to shall pass

Kids!

Ok, early in the morning I thought for sure I had just discovered a rare type of either a bug or a deformed yellow mouse.. it started when my foster dog Bella seen something under my dog Jacks wire crate.. Auggy my other dog spotted something also.. they were frantic over it.. it was moving back and forth just in the front on the floor between the front wire and floor tray.. I was in the living room the crate was in the dining room with no lights on in either room.. but the kitchen light illuminated enough for me to make out some object moving back and forth as the two dogs gave chase.. I was unable to go into the dining room at that moment because I was trying to calm my heart beat to a more normal pace.. what was this? why was it yellow? what creature comes with a yellow hump like back and moves that fast back and forth? I was bouncing back and forth between a giant flesh eating spider and a toxic mouse who has razor sharp teeth.. I didn't know if I should call 911 or my husband or grab a jar and call the tabloids.. just as I was ready to choose my daughter came down the stairs and seen this horror and reached down and picked it up and scolded the dogs for stealing her ball off her dresser...

True story

This is a bricklayers accident report which was printed in the newsletter of the British equivalent of the workers' compensation Board. This is a true story. Had this guy died, he'd have recieved a Darwin award for sure.

"Dear Sir, I am writing in response to your request for additional information in Block 3 of the accident report form. I put poor "planning" as the cause of my accident. You asked for a fuller explanation and I trust the following details will be suffucient.

I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was working alone on the roof of a new six story building. When I completed my work, I found I had some bricks left over, which, when weighted later were found to be slightly in excess of 500lbs. Rather than carry the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower then in barrel by using a pulley, which was attached to the side of the building on the sixth floor.

Securing the rope at ground level, I went up to the roof, swung the barrel out and loaded bricks into it. then I went down and untied the rope, holding it tightly to ensure a slow descent of the bricks. You will note in block 11 of the accident report form that I weigh 135lbs. Due to my supprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly, I lost my presence of mind and forgot to let go of the rope.

Needless to say, I proceeded at a rapid rate up the side of the building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel which was now proceeding downward at an equally impressive speed. This explains the fractured skull, minor abrasions and the broken collarbone, as listed in section 3 of the accident report form.

Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until my fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley. Fortunately by this time I had regained my presence of mind and was able to hold tightly to the rope.. in spite of the excruciating pain, I was now beginning to experience. At approximately the same time, however. the barrel of bricks hit the ground and bottom fell out of the barrel. Now devoid of the weight of the bricks, that barrel weighed approximately 30 lbs. I refer you again to my weight. As you might imagine, I began a rapid descent, down the side of the building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up. This accounts for the two fractured ankles, broken tooth and severe lacerations of my legs and lower body.

Here my luck began to change slightly. The encounter with the barrel seemed to slow me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into the pile of bricks and fortunately only three vertabrae were cracked. I am sorry to report, however, as I lay there on the pile of bricks, in pain, unable to move, I again lost my composure and presence of mind and let go of the rope and I lay there watching the empty barrel begin its journey back down onto me. This explains the two broken legs. I hope this answers you inquiry."